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I now face the situation that I need to get out there and meet new people who see me as I am and not a mum, partner of.. The thought of getting tarted up of a Saturday night and getting out there to 'meet someone' just feels a bit sad to me. I think it's more a state of mind as to where the person is in life.

However, I also don't want to give up on the idea of finding someone I can grow old with just yet. well perhaps the single mum, dads or those without kids but just unsure, should just get together some time to drink and laugh about the whole situation without the pressure of "picking someone up". Rather find someone with kids but I think the more important thing is getting up the confidence to get out there and chat and mingle.

Besides I'm not the one asking for advices in dating. S119, didn't mean to offend, most likely i should be apologising.

I was just asking what surprised you the most when you got back out there.

aventino, all I can say is whether you're answering a personal or doing it the old fashoined way by meeting people, just keep an open mind.

I think, in my opinoin the more women you can meet and talk to (just talk...first of course) the better idea you'll have about what's awaiting you. Met her, went out on dates and so on....we have a beautiful baby boy, couldn't be happier.

Was it the attitudes to you as a divorcee, womens expectations, what they were looking for, what exactly?

I haven't even started dating and I separated from my ex three years ago. However, aventino I think you will have no problem dating here since you are a man, even if you have kids.

A younger woman without children may well want one or more, and perhaps Aventino does not, or at least not at the moment.

you seem to imply that women over 30 are not worth bothering with at all!

It's up to you to be a good role model regardless and you both need to be happy. Anyway, sorting out my wardrobe first and throwing myself into the dating melee.

hoyo - your comments about younger women ignore the fact that older women have more life experience, more to talk about and are usually better at understanding relationships and how to make them work.

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